spiked girl gets fucked at the afterparty

17 year old virgin girl wakes up getting raped by random 38 year old man from spiking her drink at a party.

I could feel my body shake up and down. up. down. up. down. my mind was hazy, and it felt like i was just getting up from a really deep sleep. my head kept on hitting a sort of metal thing everytime I went up again. the creak of the bed started to become more apparent, every time I would go down it would be followed by that horrible sound. the sound became louder and louder, and I could feel light through my eyelids, slowly gaining consciousness.
but then I felt it. what was really happening to me. as it went back out, the pain stopped for a split second, before returning when a hard penis was shoved inside of me again. it went all the way inside of me, hitting the back of my walls and pulling back out again. my head starting aching, as I opened my eyes. my legs were u
tied to the side of the bed, and i looked behind me to see a metal railing of a bed. the lights in the room were yellow, artificial, and it smelt like cigarette smoke. where the fuck was i? a tall man stood in front of me, naked with his hairy belly protruding out. he had a scruffy brown beard, short and only covered abit of his face. the man's eyes were dark, immediately shooting up to look into mine, registering that I was awake. his hand shot up to my mouth, covering my face. I speak muffled into his palm, mostly shouts of what am I doing here and please stop.
he pulled his long dick out of me again, and put his other hand around the thick 8 inches. he rubbed a few times, and cum shot out onto my stomach. I groaned in disgust. "see how good you make me feel baby?", he moaned, bending down to kiss the top of my forehead, where he didnt cover my mouth. I shook my head violently. he removes his hand from my mouth, and slaps my face. I wince in pain. "don't you dare start screaming", he threatens and i naturally obey.
he starts to rub his dick again, before positioning himself in front of me and shoving his dick in me. he goes fast, not even waiting for it to be fully removed before shoving it back in again. my boobs jiggle with his motion, and I can't help but tear up. it hurts so badly. he moans as he pushes in, fully bashing my head against the metal now. he's pationate, vicious and he didn't even ask me if I wanted it. "dumb slut, huh?" he adds, still pounding into me. "leaving your drink unattended at a party, walking around in a tight black skirt. asking for it" he says, slowing down his pace again and he criticises my outfit.
I just wanted a day where I felt like an adult. where I can go away from my shitty parents, stressful school life, and hang out with older people. when I got there, I felt left out. it was a party for the parents of a friend of a friend, who didnt even show. it was in a hotel that i had to travel to central london for. everyone there was at least 30 and older, and im still in sixform. I dropped my Fanta on a random table, and went to the toilet. coming back, I picked up my Fanta, took a few sips and before I knew it , i felt dizzy. that's all I remember.
"please, I'll do anything you say if let me go" I beg, heart racing and he pumps cum into me. "okay doggy, get on your hands and knees. now.", he demands whilst untying my legs and arms. weak and bruised, I flip over on the bed, and get on my hands and knees like a dog. he suddenly grabs my hips from behind, and pushes them up whilst bringing me closer to the edge of the bed. a few seconds go by, with the sound of my beating heart getting increasingly louder in my ears. he suddenly rubs his cock over my asshole and pussy, before forcing his cock into my asshole. im so numb that I just take it. it hurts more and more, as he forces each inch deeper. "good girl" he compliments, as he goes in deeper and fills me up. he pulls back out and returns to my pussy, fucking me repeatedly and loosening my hole up. I've never had sex before, in a virgin. even sticking my fingers in my pussy was hard, as my hole was so tight. I hate how he's taking away my virginity, ridding me of my rights. I'm just a worthless free use toy for him.

"back up doggy" he grabs my shoulders and leads me on my knees to the floor, where he shoves his cock into my throat. I suck in as much air as I can through my nose, as he fucks my mouth violently. the salty tast of his dick surrounds my tongue, as he moans whilst putting him in me. I look up at him with watery eyes. he looks down as we make eye contact and he moans again, grabbing my head and shoving my mouth on his dick. he releases one of his hands, and grabs his phone on the bedside counter. after a few seconds, the flashlight turns on on his phone. he takes out his dick from my mouth, and I stumble on my knees fir a moment, breathing in and out of my mouth heavily. "try and tell anyone, and everybody will know how much if a cum slut you are", he commands. I nod hesitantly, and he walks over to a pile of what I assume to be my clothes. he picks then up and throws them at me. "you have 20 minutes to be out if this hotel room"

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it's been 3 months till the incident at the party. I haven't told anyone, and noone knows. but, i think there's something seriously wrong with me. sometimes at night, I grab my hairbrush, pull down my panties and fuck myself thinking about that night. I get so wet, and imagine him in me again. what the hell? why do I think about him so often.
why do I want it to happen again?