Wedding night terror from my new husband

Tad was always great with me. We started dating when I was 18 in college. It took a year, he never pushed but I was finally ready and a little over a year later I let him make love to me. I was a virgin, he was gentle and loving. Before I would use my hand on his, then after a few months he talked me into using my mouth. He was the first one I ever did any of that with. Even though I had a dorm room I spent most of my time living with him in his apartment. He was 20 when we met, and stayed on for grad school work while I finished my degree. We had sex all the time, he would even give me oral which was what I liked best. I really never had an orgasm until he bought me a vibrator. After I graduated he asked me to marry him.

On our wedding night, I changed into white lingerie. I'd listened to my mom and made sure that I had a shelf bra so my B cup boobs would be accessible, after I took off the nightgown. I put my matching lace panties on over my stockings and garter belt. Nothing new, we'd made love a lot but I was ready for anything, this was my husband now and it was our first time together in a beautiful hotel suite as man and wife. I was down to the garter, stockings, and shelf bra. He knows my nipples are very sensitive and was sucking on them, lighting caressing the skin on my boobs and inner thighs. Kissing me, he stopped, looked at me and said "Roll over". I wasn't sure what he was talking about and he said it again, "roll over". I had to ask him what he meant. The look on his face was like a demon. "I said roll over bitch, I'm your fucking husband and I am going to take your virgin ass on our wedding night". I asked again, I'd never seen him like this. "What?" I said.
"You don't understand me, Fuck how stupid a bitch did I marry, roll the fuck over on your stomach so I can fuck you in your ass"
"No, please, why are you talking like that, I'm your wife, it's me, you've never even asked about doing someting like that".
"I'm not asking now, I've been fucking your mouth and your hairy cunt for years, I'm gonna fuck you up your asshole tonight, now roll the fuck over"

With that he forced me over on my stomach. I started to get up and he held me down snarling at me "Don't even try to move WIFE, you're getting that virgin asshole fucked tonight and if you keep acting like this, I'll only fuck your asshole the whole fucking honeymoon too". I was begging and pleading for him not to act like this, what did I do? He got a tube of something and pushed my buttcheeks apart then squirted it on me. He pressed it into my hole, hurting me. "Don't, don't that hurts Tad, please don't" I was crying because he was now fingering my rear with two fingers, in and out. Before he stopped he was going so fast in and out, holding me down with his weight and a threatening fist at my face.

Then he did it, "Get ready bitch, you're gonna be a full wife now, fully fucked that is, fucked in all holes" and he pushed it in me. It burned so bad, I was crying again, tears in my eyes, breathing heavily but not vocally crying. I went silent and just laid there, my vision and dreams of my wedding night with the man I longed for, spoiled for life. He came in under 10 minutes by then the pain wasn't nearly as bad. He came up me and I had to go poop so bad. I went into the bathroom and used the toilet, cleaned up, there was blood on the tissue where I guess he tore me somewhat. I stayed in there till he banged on the door yelling that I wasn't allowed to lock a fucking door from him. I got up and opened it and sat back down on the toilet. He got a washcloth with warm water and handed it to me. "clean you ass scum off my dick" handing the cloth to me. "Stand up" he ordered. I did and cleaned off his cock and balls. He pushed me down on my knees and made me suck him hard again. His thick cock which I'd loved so much but now had given me so much to endure, I now had in my mouth. Hard he stood me up, pulled the elastic garter belt saying "get this white shit off, you're no way a fucking virgin now, fuck you've even been fucked up the ass". He reminded me how I thought one of my girlfriends who admitted doing it for her boyfriend had become a slut.

Naked now, he told me to get the tube and "grease it up again" and bend over the edge of the bed. He came up behind me and fucked me in my butt again. He came, I had to go to the toilet again, and when I came out he was asleep. I got in bed, naked like he demanded and he snuggled up to me. The next morning, I was awakened again by a hard cock pushing into my ass. My now buttfucked asshole. Then he had me order breakfast from room service. He made me only put on my white nightgown from the previous night. It was open lace, and see through the room service waiter saw all of my naked body.

He did eventually on the fourth day lick my pussy, and made love to me, but even now 7 years later, I get anal much more than regular. I can't even cum with a vibe again, he gets mad at me, thinks it demeans him so I fake it.