M in makeup, long nails, tight jeans, cut off tee. I go to ABS

I am 18m and have had hetero sex with two girls before, and homo sex now for over 4 years. I like the risk involved so I make up, style my hair pretty, put on my nails, high heels, tight jeans and a cut off tee. Once I look good I go to the ABS. I've had first timers let me suck them, them fuck me, even fucked a couple of them. I've had the sleazy ABS guys to suck off, and fuck me. I've even been forced into letting men fuck me. One time a guy was raping me (or so he thought!) and he kept me with my pants off, standing only in my heels, and bra. He let 10 other guys rape me too. That was without rubbers, and I had to get tested, thank heaven it was ok. I like the mistreatment, the fact that men know I'm there for their pleasure. I like that if I'm not "willing" they'll take me anyway if they want.

One of my lovers was from a bookstore. He'd raped me, this time it was actually rape, and took my jeans and cut off tee. I was left with my panties on the floor, my garter and stockings on, along with my bra. I pulled on the panties which had a load of cum in them and tried to get the counter womans attention. She finally came in the back and I told her what happened. She turned around saying "So walk to your fucking car, what do I care, you dress like that and come here, what the hell do you expect". She turned and walked away and I felt a hand down my panties in back feeling my ass. I turned to say no but it was a really big guy who pushed me up against the wall, pulled my panties down and started fucking me. I was being raped a second time. The counter lady came and stood in the doorway to the back. I was up against the wall right next to the door, she was watching me get raped. The rapist came in my butt, pulled out and walked over to the lady and kissed her. "Thanks sis for telling me about him" and he walked out. She threw a black satin mini dress like a domme wears at me. It was one of the costumes the place had for sale. I put it on and left.

When I got home, my wallet was between my door and the screen door. A note too "I know where you live now, you have a nice pussy and look really pretty. I'll be back at 10pm tonight, let me in and it won't be so rough" it said. I cleaned my self out and cleaned up, at at 10 was in a see through baby doll nightie with ruffled matching panties. He didn't say anything just pushed me into the bedroom, bent me over the bed and fucked me. After he was done he introduced himself. He comes around a lot now and I try to let him be the only one that cums inside me, but sometimes I don't have a choice.

I realize I'm just a gay whore for men to use and cum in. It's what I want to be